Tuesday, May 27, 2003 : 100 years from now everyone on Earth will be gone. Kinda puts things in perspective doesn't it? That's the title of a chapter in the book "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff" (I forget the author, sorry). Great bathroom reading. I'm trying to keep perspective's like that to help control my stress and, well, not sweat the small stuff. And as the title also attests, its all small stuff.
And so I'm wondering today why the Hell I spend so much time, money, effort on keeping myself fit, young, beautiful. What has happened to us? Most of us do this don't we? Why can't I just grow old gracefully and still be attractive to other people and not be simply rejected because my abs don't count to six, my skin is less than perfect and my hairline is receding? Wow it scares me. If everyone is looking for someone gorgious to have as their mate, then we'll all be looking for someone else until we die, and most will die alone and lonely. Sad conclusion yes? That's why I am praying it is not true! What I want is an oxymoron: to love and be attracted to someone based on something other than their looks. Is this possible? I certainly hope so, because I simply can not keep up this beauty contest thing for the rest of my life. Jeez. ARRGHH!!!!
With that said, I had my measurements taken this weekend with my trainer Josh. After 6 weeks of hard working, getting up at 5 a.m., changing my entire diet, and all I have to show for it is 1 inch lost in the waist and 1 inch gained in the size of my legs. Everything else is the same. Lost some body fat, but nowhere near what our goal was.
So I made myself and Josh a promise. That I would stop drinking completely for the next three weeks to see if that makes the difference. Josh is like "duh, a bottle of wine a day?" Jeez. It slows my motabolism he says. And we both know, he says, it ain't good for me (he says in his southern drawl). Yes yes. We knows. So, this probable alchoholic, at least problem drinker, is attempting to give up drinking to see if we can meet our fitness goals (what ever happened to "eat drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die?"). I've made it two days so far and have not died or had a heart attack. And I must admit, not drinking the night before getting up at 5 a.m. makes it a hella lot easier!
Thursday, May 22, 2003 :
Whew! Finally a breather from life -- enough time to check in here.
This project I'm heading at work is consuming me. It's exhiliarating and satisfying, but consuming. It's at work that I usually take time to write in this log. Anyway, hello there.
Last weekend I flew to Albuerqueque with my mother to visit my sister and her family and to watch and celebrate with my nephew on his graduation from UNM. Only two weeks before that, his sister, my niece, hot married in Las Vegas. I did not attend that, as I needed to choose one or the other to attend due to fncances and timing issues. My niece, it would seem "forgot" to take her birth control pills with her boyfriend and she got pregnant, and now they are getting married. The young man seems very nice, I really hope they last.
I took my wonderful 35 mm Canon camera with me for the festivities. I love photography, but have not been doing much with it lately. When I was in Sydney about 2 years ago, the exchange rate was great for Americans, and I bought about $3,000 worth of camera equipment at the Duty Free station at the airport for about $600. I got to play with it at my nephew's graduation ceremonies and the graduation party. I have yet to develop the film, but am looking forward to seeing how they turned out. The pictures will be my graduation present to him. I'd really like to get back into photograpy. I love landscape and people photography. I've got a nice collection of photos already that I'm proud of, and want to continue.
My workouts are going great. My trainer, Josh, is so great. Turns out he is straight, but that's cool. Helps me focus on my workouts instead of dreaming we might go out on a date. :) I can't believe it myself, but I get up at 5 a.m. weekdays (2x) and work out weekends. I'm noticing a difference and I'm determined to keep it up! The same people are at the gym at those hours. Others who are into their gym routine.
I know absolutely NO ONE will care a bit about this, but I had my car detailed two days ago while working at home, and yesterday I had my teeth cleaned. I'll be applying a round of whitener to my freshly scrubbed teeth. Why would I share that? I have no idea but somehow there seems to be a weird connection between the cleaning of my car and the cleaning of my teeth.
Formerly "A Day in the life of a Gay Guy", I've changed the name to reflect more of how I'm thinking. Being Gay is not the focal point of my life. I'm a guy with interests like everyone else, I just happen to be Gay.
